*Anatomy of Pain.*


*Anatomy of Pain.*

Last week, I walked into the hospital room of a young woman whose story left me heartbroken. As we began to talk, she shared with me the reasons why her womb was damaged and how she was diagnosed with AIDS. It all started when she was a teenager and afraid of being left out. Her friends were all "doing it" and she couldn't handle the pain of being left behind, so she made a decision that would alter the course of her life forever.

"I had my first abortion when I was just seventeen," she said, tears streaming down her face. "I thought it was the only way to keep my boyfriend at the time. He said he loved me but he wasn't ready to be a father."

As the years passed, she continued to have more abortions. Each time, she believed it was the only way to avoid the pain and shame of being a single mother. But she never imagined that her actions would lead to a much greater pain.

"I met my husband when I was twenty-five," she continued. "We fell in love and got married a year later. I didn't tell him about my past because I was afraid he would leave me. But when we started trying to have children, we discovered that my womb was damaged. It was then that I had a vision of God telling me that I had killed the four children I was supposed to have on earth through abortion."

The young woman's greatest fear had come true: she could never have children. But that wasn't the end of her pain. Her husband, now HIV positive, had left her.

"He said he couldn't stay with someone who had lied to him and put his life in danger," she said, sobbing. "It's all my fault. If only I had been brave enough to face the lesser pain of being left out or being a single mother, maybe I wouldn't be in this much pain."

As I listened to her story, I couldn't help but wonder how many other young women were making the same mistakes. How many were letting fear of embracing the lesser pain and shame dictate the course of their lives? How many were sacrificing their health, their dreams, and even their future for temporary relief?

I realized It is better to experience the lesser pain, to face our fears head on, and to make decisions that align with our values and beliefs. Because in the end, it is the lesser pain that fades away, while the greater pain stays with us for a lifetime.
© Udeme Ralph

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